I'm so New Orleans like 1825....Tulane!

As I sat back to my New Orleans version of a complete dinner listening to The Drought 3 I started to think "How New Orleeeens am I?"


I reps...I reps HARD

And I'm straight from Claiborne nicka just ask Liz! what

this is My I heart da N.O. post...trust this is a form of therapy for this semester!!!

Ooh the summer before senior year started in high school...ooh da afterpartys "Welcome 2 Tha Nolia" is my ish! what!

let's reminisce together

I've been the angry Black woman this week. I'm disappointed with myself concerning certain issues Plus finals are coming up, Plus i have 5 more papers to finish...or start before then, Plus Jazz Fest is going on and I don't think ima be able to go >:(
I know I'm suppose to but I just can't find the silver lining here. Oh yeah Plus one of my bosses told me she just hasn't figured me out yet? Why are you trying to?
Ughhh

I'll holla at ya'll after finals

in the meantime i'll try to keep my head up and right fist raised

duece

Woke up this morning...wrote myself a blog...wrote myself a blog

“We’ve got to air our dirty laundry” I’ve heard this comment surface by numerous Black professionals during the course of the last two weeks regarding the accountability of misogynistic lyrics in hip hop. Is that really OUR dirty laundry, or just the colored clothes in a hamper full of dirty laundry? I have been so fed up over the entire Imus situation because I know that we are not ready to hold the correct parties accountable for the sake of being politically correct. We see the effects of historical white privilege and racism in all institutions today but will not make a direct correlation between it and the music industry...mainly hip hop. We acknowledge that most commercial rappers (the ones who Imus listened to calling women “nappy head hos”) were most likely raised in improvised neighborhoods, educated in an inferior school system, in a single family household...etc. We can clearly see their childhood is consumed with the results of institutionalized systems that produce racially disparate outcomes with ideologies of “Get Money” by any means necessary.

“My mother gave birth but she really never had me
Left to the hood to play daddy
Raised by niggaz named Butch through the bay bay”
- Common

"They say my ghetto intrumental, detrimental to kids
As if they can't see the misery in which they live
Blame me, for the outcome, ban my records - check it
Don't have to bump this but please respect it"
-Pac

Hip hop and it’s environment are mutually exclusive. We can’t demand a change of the lyrics when it’s a direct reflect of a racialized environment. But oh, I forgot...racism ended after the Civil Rights Movement. Riiight. And let’s not make the connection between the American Identity and the historical accounts of the attack on the Black female body. Dorothy Roberts sums that up in here
I’m not as offended by racial/sexist slurs when I know that their are systems of institutions that have systematically neglected to include me. Not saying the words don’t hurt but I’m a big girl and I understand the sticks and stones cliché

"In time I learned a few lessons
Never fall for riches
Apologizies to my TRUE sisters
Far from bitches
Help me raise my black nation
Reperations are due
Its true
Caught up in this world
I took advantage of you
So tell the babies how I love them
Precious boys and girls
Born Black in this white mans world"

Gaining One's Definition

I think inspiration always comes when you need it most and exactly from whom you need it.

This week I've gone through more emotions than my Katrina week, but even in that example I know that things can only get better.

I've been disappointed in people when I shouldn't be. People are just that...people. Beings that are constantly learning from trials and mistakes.

I have to start praying to be more obedient to God's will. You know my constant praying during Katrina was to be obedient to God's lessons during this time in my life. I used to pray for God to walk and talk with me during the day but then I started to analyze that I was just asking for God to be God...in which He could be without me. So then my prayer started to change to ask for Him to help me be the person He wanted me to be. To be constant and obedient to his daily callings for me.

It's an everyday battle. But the reward is so much greater than the struggle.

My cuz played this song for me like 50 times today (we'll that's how many it seemed like) but it was exactly what I needed to hear and know:

You can spend your whole life building something from nothing
One storm can come and blow it all away
Build it anyway
You can chase a dream that seems so out of reach
and you know it might not ever come your way
Dream it anyway
God is great, but sometimes life ain't good
And when I pray it doesn't always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway, I do it anyway
This world's gone crazy and it's hard to believe that tomorrow will be better than today
Believe it anyway
You can love someone with all your heart,
for all the right reasons, and in a moment they can choose to walk away
Love 'em anyway
You can pour your soul out singing a song you believe in that tomorrow
they'll forget you ever sang
Sing it anyway, sing it anyway
I sing, I dream, I love, anyway,

***Spoiler**** Random ranting blog

When someone's got something on their mind...they are gonna let u know...even when it is 5 months later.

I've taken my own advise and really try to get to know my neighbors. I've been living at my place for almost a year and still haven't had a conversation with my neighbors. I mean, I'm not rude and all, I throw the dueces or a "Hey dere!"...it's a New Orleans thang! Well, I have some firemen who stay directly next to me. I think I was a lil intimidated and then that perpetuated a limited version of a conversation to just "whassup" every so often. About a week before my b-day I started inviting random people to my party so I sent a message through one of them that I was having the b-day bash of the year (OH my dear and indeed it was!) Well I didn't think they were gonna come cause the dude just hit me with a lil "fo sho, we'll pass through" and off he drove to save the city from it's burning self. The night of my party I was getting ready and some friends passed by my house before going to the club. As I was walking them out my neighbors were all out like "Whassup with the party tonight...why u not dressed?" as grown as i was I laughed and asked them the same. Long story short they passed through but I was too through to notice lol. Okay, long story even shorter. I just sat with one of em for 2 hours talkin bout Everything and in the middle of the conversation he said, "Oh yeah, that's cool. You ain't have to invite us to your New Year's Party. I ain't tripping though"

LMAO.

New Year's was a good nite.

LMAO

Moral of the story is: Invite your neighbors to some of ya lil get togethers every now and then...specially if they some cute, fine firemens...LOL

Understanding and wisdom became the rhythm that I played to And became a slave to master self

One of my friends became a Mother yesterday. It was only likely that we reminisced on our college days and how far in life we've come since then. As we talked and joked about the Summer of 2000 (water balloon fights with the neighbors in the adjacent apt...on the second floor! lol her teaching me how to drive in someone else's car LMAO, summer flings, late night conversations, roommate fights, love & basketball, Nickas who wear Timbs in the summer lol) I had to take a step back and acknowledge the strength of our friendship. From dumb ass fights to real ish she's had my back through it all and even though she's an hour away I know she'd be here if need be.

Since that Summer of 2000 I've experienced both ends of phucked up friendships. I've had to learn to forgive myself for my phucked up actions to acknowledge the lessons that ultimately had to be learned in order for me to grow. I still phuck up from time to time but that's just because I'm stubborn...well maybe strong willed lol.

I believe that friendships are seasonal and some expire once certain life experiences are completed. Everyone is in our life for a reason...Yes, even ________(fill in the blank):( but don't get caught up in the hype trying to predict people through tomorrow's situations...enjoy who you have today and let that ish just Be!

"Never looking back
or too far in front of me
The present is a gift
and I just wanna BE"

Un-shun:::insert silly comment:::Re-shun LMAO

So I'm bloggin straight from the biblioteca.

I am proud to claim the day productive!!!! Yeah! Solo weekend #1 is halfway over...only 3 more to go...eh, with the exception of a little time at Jazz Fest :)

Overall yesterday I left work feeling satisfied with some things and unsatisfied with others. I had a client that I initially met eh, a week ago. I finally spoke to her yesterday to get some additional documents and she ended up coming by the office to talk to me. For those who don't know I work with a non profit agency that helps families facing eviction and/or homelessness (well, that's one of my jobs lol). I don't agree with some of the tactics, requirements and bullish that clients have to adhere to but I really think I'm there for a reason...even if it's to emotionally comfort the client while serving them. Anyways my client came over and we just had a real conversation. She's 28, has 2 children, facing eviction, disconnection of utilities, unemployed, and also has severe phenominia (she also died on the emergency room table during her last hospital stay two months ago).
By the end of the day Friday I was able to stop her landlord from persuing her case legally and able establish two contacts in the city that MIGHT be able to help with her utility bill. While waiting for my contacts I decided I'd try to call the utility company to see if I could get an extenstion for my client's disconnect date. Here's how the conversation went:
Me: Hi, I'm the Minority Reporter, I work for a nonprofit agency and I would like to make a pledge on a client's account and ask for an extension of disconnect
Da Utility Co: Oh, that's no problem at all. I just need your information and the account number of your client. You don't need to ask for an extension. When a nonprofit pledges an account we take the disconnect notice off and basically tag the account as "paid"
Me: Oh really, okay, here's the information
D.U.C.: Okay, thanks, MR, I just need to transfer you so that you can get this settled.
D.U.C.#2: Good afternoon, how may I help you
::::I repeat all that was said to the previous person and was given the same information and transfered:::
D.U.C. #3: Good afternoon, how may I help you
:::I try not to be fustrated this time and again repeat all that was said to the previous person:::
D.U.C. #3: Oh, I'm sorry. I can't help you with that. You would need to call the finance department, they handle pledges.
Me: What's their number?
D.U.C. #3: Your director should have that phone number?
Me: My director? She is telling me that she doesn't have the phone number. What is the issue that you can't supply me with the number?
D.U.C. #3: It's a security precaution, ma'am
Me: Wait, are we talking about a Phone #?
D.U.C. #3: Yes, ma'am
Me: And NO one in your department has this number that MY director is Suppose to have?
D.U.C. #3: No, ma'am
Me: So, I have a client, who has two young children, has a pledge to relieve her from disconnection of her utilities and it can't be done because you don't have the number to the finance department?
D.U.C. #3: Umm, yes ma'am
Me: You know this is bullshit right?
D.U.C. #3: I'm sorry ma'am

:::hangs up the phone disguisted *&%(&#*(&$#*&$#(*$#)_(@)#(@*)*%)(&%#*)&#)$*#)*)$*#@*@*#@:::

I get a call from the Jesuits saying they might be able to help out and pay it directly.

Eh, it was a good day. One could only hope what Monday will bring.

"I’m a good person that said a bad thing" and i quote

I love working at a school...double Spring Break!!!!!

So, in the spirit of Spring Break I didn't wake up until 9. The morning routine starts with a prayer, roll over to check my phones and turn on the t.v. to catch the weather and some of the Today Show...oh ish! Where's my remote, I need to record this:

“…and believe me, I know, that that phrase didn’t originate in the white community. That phrase originated in the Black community. And I’m not stupid, I may be a white man but I know that these young women, young Black women all through THAT society are demeaned and discouraged and disrespected by their own Black men and that they are called that name. And I know that that doesn’t give me obviously doesn’t give me any right to say it but it doesn’t give them any right to say it” -Imus

“but the problem is We are the price of tuition. Black people’s lives become the tuition for the learning of America. The question is, “Is that too high a price to pay?” It’s a teachable moment but at what expense?” - Michael Eric Dyson

I keep hearing how this situation is opening up room for conversation about racism and sexism...uh, didn't we think Katrina would do the same? Shock, outrage/anger, protest, apology, Ooh did you hear, they announced who Anna Nicole's babydaddy was. (the latter can be replaced by any media/celebrity phenomena of the day) What I can't seem to understand is how this situation is viewed as if racism is only practiced by certain individuals and can be reprimanded by public apologies...as if the media as an institution doesn't practice racism/sexism. As if employment diversity within this industry doesn't practice racism/sexism. We, as a nation are not willing to come to terms with our history or our present. We think that in order to be a racist you have to ride around in the night on a horse with sheets burning crosses. The sheets have long ago been replaced with business suits and those crosses...well those are our segregated houses, low wage jobs, unemployment, dilapidated schools, the 9th ward, GEE/LEAP tests, etc.

arite on to something else

As I read through the blogs I notice a certain theme...we are all on the home stretch. Our sanity and happiness lies between now and finals...let da grindin begin!

"I cried because I had no shoes, 'till I met a man who had no feet"
Over Spring Break my Stats teacher emailed us our test grade and midterm grade...dammit! Thanks Outlook for showing me the email without me having to open it! Although I really didn't study as well as I could've for the test, I thought I still would've done better than I did...damn C...so I was kinda bummed to know I had a B at midterm...til I got to class today and found out that damn near half the class had a C for midterm. Eh, that's the purpose for the quote.

"Do I sound stupid, or as if I don't know what I'm talking about?"
I'm taking this one undergrad class for grad credit and some of the students in the class aren't aware. After chatting with "da crew" after class I ran into this guy from our class. He immediately asked me what I got on my paper (we received back today). I chucked and told him I got an A. "How'd YOU get an A?" My immediate reaction was to pop da piss outta him...but i thought...what would Jesus do? Obviously this story doesn't end in me whaling on him...but "watch ya back son!"

Blog fam…it feels good to be back! I’m feeling like the prodigal blogger now. LMAO


Independent Lens has a new feature tonight called Black Gold, you should check it out

Hey, where did my Spring Break go?!!?!?!

Is it me or is time moving at a pace that I can't seem to keep up with? I feel like I'm making the best use out of my time but as soon as I turn around something new is always at hand. I guess that's living huh?

We're working out the home stretch for this semester...a month and counting...down! Plans for the summer might change...but then again, they might not.

R. Kelly songs really do bother me. I mean the man is an awesome artist but some ish I just can get past. I feel guilty when "im a flirt" comes on in the club and i find myself groovin to that ish. damn robert kelly.

Happy Resurrection Day!

It's cold and raining outside today :( what's up with that? 43 degrees & light rain today and back to 80 degrees on friday, eh?

well, I'm finished burning my scalp under this hair dryer so I'll throw the dueces until later

Oh I forgot...I woke up this morning...got myself a gun....LMAO jed.

"Is This IT?"

Somebody get Mary Landrieu on the phone...(504) 589-2427

and tell her to support and introduce H.R. 1227 to the Senate

H.R. 1227: Gulf Coast Hurricane Housing Recovery Act of 2007
To assist in the provision of affordable housing to low-income families affected by Hurricane Katrina.

Go to... Bill Status Summary Amendments Floor Speeches Other Info

Bill Status
Feb 28, 2007 Introduced
Mar 16, 2007 Scheduled for Debate
Mar 21, 2007 Passed House
- Voted on in Senate
- Signed by President

This bill has been passed in the House. The bill now goes on to be voted on in the Senate.


Who has the right to return home to New Orleans? Clearly if you are Black, poor, live in the projects and have been the result of systematic abuse of power and institutionalized racism HUD and HANO has singlehandedly tried to reject your right to return. Justifying their decision based on historical racial projects ending in self prophecy of the demise of the inner city Black, HUD has sought to demolish 4 of New Orleans housing development under the HOPE VI program...oh did I mention this project of decentralizing poverty while introducing and revitalizing a mixed income neighborhood was first introduced under the Clinton "our first black president" term?...just thought i'd mention it.

Shout out to Maxine Waters...Mary Landrieu, stand the _______ up! I know you can do it...well at least that's what you made me feel when your brother was running for mayor. Look at the example of the St. Thomas....what happened with 1 to 1 rebuilding there?????

The St. Thomas Housing Development in the Irish Channel area of New Orleans was home to 1600 apartments of public housing. After St. Thomas was demolished under Hope VI, the area was called River Gardens. River Gardens is a mixed income community - home now to 60 low income families, some middle income apartments, a planned high income tower, and a tax-subsidized Wal-Mart! Our tax dollars at work – destroying not only low-income housing but neighborhood small businesses as well

Get at te Advancement Project and just in case the Senate chooses not to pass this Bill we got a Plan B

It's a celebration Biiiitches

and i don't mean bitch in a disrespectful way. I mean it in a general way to describe ___________ lmao..

Party tonight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I been waiting 25 years for this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Top 10 songs I wouldn’t tell Pearl Cleage I know…some word 4 word:

after commenting on Back Packer Week Presents: The Back Packer Box Set this blog idea cloud hit me

Get Low (Lil Jon & dem boyz from da eastside)
Nasty Bitch (Buckdown)
Take It Off (dem underground Kings)
Bomb A$$ P*ssy (Dogg Pound)
Ain’t No Fun (Snoop D-O-double G)
Call Me (Lil Kim n Too $hort)
My bad…all of Hardcore (Kimmy)
Bitch I don’t need ya (Trina & Papi Trick)
P Poppin (Luda and DTP)
Everyday I’m F*ing Him (Remy Ma)

believe it or not it only took me a couple seconds to come up with this list

Cause she's my favorite rapper. Period!

Now why has it taken everybody so long to figure out how dope Jean Grae is?!?!?!

I love this cornbread so much, I want to take it behind a middle school, and get it pregnant.

this is my Favorite show ever...fool!

Ah, the beginning is nearer than we think...or is it the end...either way I got myself a gun!

So I thought my clock would automatically change it's time...it didn't

I also thought my phone's time would be correct when I look at it...it wasn't

Thank goodness for Directv...now where's that credit on my bill lol

Ah, long week fam

Yesterday was the fair at school...it felt like a mini Jazz Fest. It was good to finally meet and sit down and talk with some of the parents...instead of the quick "bonjour" during the morning rush. One of them even invited me to their house in Switerland this summer while I'm in France...I'll take them up on that offer!

I have a ish load of reading to do within the next 24 hrs. aghhhhhh (that's my tired yell)

im sorry ya'll...this blog is representing where my head is right now...everywhere. I'm gonna take a walk and holla back later!

First off I'm bout my dough and cheese..just call me a slice of pizza LMAO/And the countdown begins...

Okay, so we've set the date...March 24th...it's going down!!!!! 26 will be brought in rizzite!!! lol that was lame...but u get me.

damn 26

Eh, never mind.

Oooh, I got to leave these four walls last night and socialize! That's what was up! Sorry for those who didn't get the msg...but here's the new one...DA 24th (Blackarican, this is 4 u! pass dat ish on to the rest of the cingular heads out there)

and what the heck is up with these bruises on my forearms? that's not what's up...I wish I could remember what happened last night!

And ain't that a female dog. I'm just realizing I don't get text msgs from people who don't have Sprint of Nextel...I wonder if there is a -ism for dat

Throw some D's on dat .....!

oops, I'm throwing D's everywhere.

Isn't "What goes around" "Cry me a river" part dos...either way...dat's my ish!!!! esp. the last 2 minutes...JT is all like "Wait B, I ain't even much finish, let me throw some d's on u" then he continues on to have the last laugh.

Andre 3000 is the ish!!!! I been knowing this but his latest appearances on the Walk it out Rmx, Want You rmx, and Throw some d's rmx just proves that he will always be one of the illest from the south...I swear he's the only reason I listened to these songs...well, I must admit I do like to walk it out...It's a down South thang!!!!

I said, "what time you get off?"
She said, "when you get me off"
I kinda laughed but it turned into a cough
Because I swallowed down the wrong pipe
Whatever that mean, you know old people say it so it sounds right
So I'm standing there embarrassed, if we were both in Paris
I would have grabbed her by the waist and kissed her, but
We in the middle of whole foods, and those foods
Ain't supposed to beef, but you'd think I hate tofu
Check-out line got rowdy, my vision got cloudy
I started seeing some circles like some Audi Emblem,
I'm hearing them say, "come on man
Do this own your own time, get the hell on, man"
I walked out, hm, I got bout
Half-way to my car when I heard shorty shout
"3000, forgot your credit card, smart move
By the way, my little sister loves your cartoon
Well, here's my name and numb
If I ain't the one, lose it, if I am, use it"
"If a man chooses, and he can, do's it
And he don't, don't take it personal, he might be might be swamped"
"With making mozzarella"
"No, making worlds better
Cheese will come, believe me, I'm,
never focused on the cash
Ask Mel Gibson, Jesus Christ, I'm bout the pass...ion"

Lo siento...por ti

Why is it that we are complacent in a society where we have been socially constructed to accept "Better late than never" as the normal response for gov't phuck ups and their delayed reactions/responses/etc. Then to make matters worse, WE’VE internalized this message and use it to justify our own shortcomings...towards ourselves as well as others.

I guess it's the readings in school, my return back to the city, shit, it could just be me realizing there's only 2 days left in Black History Month that's got me on edge. But damn... Better late than never??????????????

Naw…u gotta come better than that

tell that to the people who were in the Superdome, Convention Center, under their refrigerator in their flooded homes, left in the nursing homes, hospitals, the 9th wd, tell that to the bodies that'll never be found floating in the Mississippi, tell it to that motherless children that are walking around

lost.

While in Costa Rica, I came up with a saying "Lo siento...por ti" translated "I'm sorry...for you (if that’s the way You feel). I'm coming across as "the angry Black woman" right now...and that's cool with me...I AM. I'm tired of the lies and bullshitting that's been going on about my city, even though I tend to sometimes perpetuate em...the truth hurts. Someone asked me about the city the other day and I said, "It's coming along" I had to return to that person 5 minutes later to tell him the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. I heart The Boondocks, and one of my favorite episodes is The Return of the King. The most profound quote from that show was when Huey told MLK that he needed to tell people the truth...and not the pretty truth. the ugly truth that makes people angry and makes them get out and do something (i am sooo paraphrasing).

The truth huh?!?!?!?

Let me say Lo siento...por ti, if you feel that every one of my blogs focuses on the dark side, lack of recovery and negative aspects of New Orleans...that's what I'm living...Everyday!!!!

But let me also say that if I didn't feel I could make a change, I wouldn't be back here...in New Orleans. But in order to rebuild, we must continue to reveal the harsh realities of racism and classism that Katrina exposed. That's hard...especially when some people think racism is a thing of the black & white pre-technicolor "I have a dream" past, not linking it to the prison industrial complex that is overrepresented by Blacks and Browns especially when Blacks, Browns and whites commit crimes in proportion to their population, or that toxic sites are in majority Black/minority neighborhoods, or when a War on Poverty systematically criminalizes people who have been shut out of the work force due to the deindustrialization, or the outsourcing of jobs etc...just to name of a few of the ways that the prejudice and racism of the jim/jane crow era has reinvented itself to the institutionalized racism of today.

Vacation is over...time for da grind to commence

I've been this close:: holds thumb & index finger about a centimeter apart:: from saying one of the best angry quotes of all times:
"Die bitch nigga die I hope you bleed a lake
I'ma play x-ray, helpin' y'all see the fake" -Weezy "F" Baby...please say da baby

but I ain't gonna go there. Ain't no need. Just gotta sort through the emotions and make it to the other side of this here dilemma.

Holla!

Do you know what it means to miss New Orleans

It took FOREVER to get to the airport this evening...TRAFFIC ALL through the town.

I shed a tear with a stranger while on the plane. Listen up, don't be fooled and think Katrina was something that happened August 29 2005. Shit is complicated, but I shed a tear over something so simple...the right to return home. Again, don't be fooled because you see the city putting on Mardi Gras...TRUST! If you do your research on who puts on majority of these parades that are a part of PRIVATE organizations who pool from their OWN money...you wouldn't be that suprised to know those are the same people who were/are able to return to New Orleans without the assistance of federal monies. PEOPLE ARE NOT ABLE TO RETURN HOME New Orleans is so much more than the titties and Bourbon st, the french quarter, the multi million dollar homes on st. charles. New Orleans was founded upon a culture different in every aspect, french, catholic, check your slave history, check ya Treme history, check ya jazz history, check ya blues history, etc.

The right/option to return HOME

I've seen this sign all around the city since I've been back



Uh huh, I do...but I don't have to miss here from so far away. I wanna give other people that chance.

And PLEASE understand...there's a 9th ward, downtown, extreme poverty, racism,etc. in your city...What's your Katrina? What are you doing to prevent it from reaching Catagory 5 levels?